Attention Chemists

Any chemists out there, whether you're named Jarvis or not, I still need your help. Take pity on a washed up journalist now working as a technical writer but secretly wishing he'd gone and got a MA in creative writing like his sister. Read this. Then, toward the end, note where I left a hole in the story that's begging to be filled by a simple chemistry experiment.

Your contribution will be acknowledged. Thanking you in advance, I am but your humble servant.