I Ought to Get Bonus Points for This One

Here's the latest major score in "Find the Obscure Character Actor."

Today, watched this. Not the first time I watched it either.

The show features this delightful old codger.

This time around, I suddenly noticed I'd seen this guy before. But I wanted to be sure. So I went to IMDB.

Learned one thing: His character name is Mr. Shork. Not Jacques, which is what it sounds like he says. See if I'm wrong:

I swear he says "Jacques." But listening to it again, knowing his name is Shork, I can hear Shork.

Weird.

So, How Do You Get an Insurance Company to Apologize?

Dawned on us this week, reading the yearly escrow report for our mortgage, that our homeowner’s insurance is going up by $430 a year. That’s about a 37% increase.

That’s a wallop.

Yes, we did have a claim for the Great April Hail Storm of 2018. Our only claim in more than 20 years of home ownership. I guess we take this as a sign not to make any insurance claims.

But that begs the question: If we can’t make insurance claims, why have insurance in the first place? Legally, it’s not required. We have enough equity in the home they can’t make us insure it. But going without insurance seems like complete folly. As does paying insurance and making claims and seeing the price go up.

I guess this is where you have to sit down and do the math.

The hail damage to roof and siding clocked in at over $10,000. So in another 23 and ¼ years of home ownership – barring any other rate increases or additional claims – we’ll have paid the company back for the money they gave us.

I’ll be 70 years old. A little old corporal, probably having gone in in my puberty and come out in my adultery several times by then, if Radar is any indication. So I guess, playing the long game, maybe this isn’t all that bad.

Of course, the rate increase stings now. With an additional 23 or so years under my belt, maybe I’ll be worried less about paying for homeowners’ insurance and worried much more about drooling all over myself.

But that’s not now. That’s not getting texts from Michelle saying she wants the insurance company to apologize, at the end of all things.

So that brings up the question posed: How do you get an insurance company to apologize?

And, having secured said apology through whatever Herculean means necessary, how do you not hear the hollow, evil laughter afterward?

Collect Underpants . . . Rich Dad, Poor Dad . . . ?. . . Profit!

Through the mere act of writing about books like “Rich Dad, Poor Dad,” in a negative manner, I instantly fulfill the prophecies of individuals like Robert T. Kiyosaki and Sharon Lechter (this book’s authors) and their adherents.

By leveling any criticism at such books, those who believe them can automatically say, “Well, since you don’t believe, you’ll never accomplish what the books say you can. The failure is entirely at your feet.”

Maybe that’s right.

And maybe that’s a load of barnacles.



Because if we’re honest about it, any dismissal, any failure, any result that does not end in adherents’ retirement at an early age with pots of money, is a failure, according to this book. We weren’t smart enough. We weren’t as open to risk as we should have been. We’re suckers.

And maybe we are.

Then again, maybe we’re not.

But right now I’m withholding judgment. Because with these books, it’s easy to say dammit this isn’t anything I can do and walk off, not realizing you might already be doing part of it and doing more might not be all that difficult.

As far as I’ve read, the ideas presented herein aren’t on the surface, all that complicated. Have more assets than liabilities is the basic tenet. And know how to tell an asset from a liability.

If you own a home but you’re still paying a mortgage on it, that’s a liability.

Those solar panels on the rooftop? Make damn sure they’re paying for themselves, and that you get the loan you took out to install them paid off as quickly as they can so they can get moved to the asset column, rather than remain as a liability.

There is some good advice to be found. For a long time, it sounded like these folks were saying “Go start your own business.” But that’s not necessarily the case. If you want to, start your own business. But be ready for failure, because they acknowledge most new businesses end in the ashcan.

So what are assets, per these dweebs? Here’s the list:

1. Businesses you personally don’t have to run (if you do, that’s a job, not an asset, which seems kinda weird.)
2. Stocks
3. Bonds
4. Mutual funds
5. Income-generating real estate
6. IOUs
7. Royalties from intellectual property
8. Anything else that has value, produces income, or appreciates and has a ready market.

So, was Homer right all along?

Still, I’m reminded of this:

So, sucker, you may ask. Doing any of this? Or are you going to be a corporate slave for the rest of your unnatural life?

Am doing some. What I am doing is my own business. I will share a little.

Remember those solar panels? Thanks to government tax incentives, we’ve paid down nearly a third of the loan. We also signed up with the solar company on the last day they were offering to make our loan payments for the first eighteen months. They said many people would take the tax money, or the loan payment money, and fritter it away on other stuff, but we rolled it all back into the loan, along with additional money of our own to pay down that principal. And while teething pains in the first year didn’t show us the promised 100% reduction in our electric bill, we haven’t had to pay for electricity since February. (Contrary to what the solar company told us, the panels will not produce any electricity if they’re covered in snow, so keep that in mind when you’re contemplating doing solar on your own.)

Also, paying for tax software for the 2018 tax year paid off, getting us deductions I thought weren’t possible or that we’d have to spread out over more than one tax year. That $50 spent on Quicken was money well-spent, and I’ll do it again. Maybe. Maybe I learned enough for 2018 that I can save that money for 2019. We’ll see. Still beats paying a professional to do it.

I’m hoping the authors get to the nuts and bolts of collecting enough money to find and grow assets. Because I’m pretty certain that’s where most people fail.

And it’s clear Kiyosaki has his critics, including his co-author, who sued him over something. And apparently his book became a best-seller partly because he got hooked up with Amway.

No surprise to find some of his critics selling their own books. But there’s a lot of good reading here.

Deer Strike

Considering how many trips we've made to and from various scout camps in the past eight years, I'm surprised this hasn't happened before. But it happened this week. Michelle hit a deer in the Tardis, somewhere near Harriman State Park.

If the Idaho Department of Fish and Game had its way, this might have been avoided. They'd like to put up fencing to prevent large game from crossing the roads, with a few overpass-style wildlife crossings. But the residents of Fremont County decided they didn't want that. So can I send them the bill?

Yes, this is our new car. Lucky for us. Lucky in that we have the comprehensive insurance coverage, which will fix this. And also lucky that it came with emergency roadside care through 2023, so all we had to do to get it from Harriman to Idaho Falls was make a phone call.

What you see leaking I'm fairly certain is windshield wiper fluid, as that's where the reservoir is. But Michelle was getting a lot of warning messages on the dash, so having someone come retrieve the vehicle for us was a blessing.

And Michelle wasn't hurt. The biggest blessing of all. Though she was shedding tears for the deer.

Seeing the Redwoods

They always ask for pictures.

Some are very precise. They want pictures from the Carcassonne Montes. Something from the wall of Basile Crater – as if both were just around the corner.

“Send me something spectacular,” many of them say, unsure of what they want, where on the moon I am, or what wonders they should want to capture.

So I send them something spectacular.

I send them a shot of my view from the toilet.

There, they can see – in most of my refuges – a cot, a cupboard, a robe on a hook. Maybe a spare space suit, some SCBA tanks and whatnot.

And they are, to a person, disappointed.

“Looks like my dorm room,” they say.

“You didn’t even put away your socks,” said another.

A few, they understand.

Had a long talk with a fellow from the middle of America somewhere. He knew.

“I’ve been to the redwoods in California,” he said. “I have hundreds of photos. But looking at those photos, it’s like looking at the world through a window the size of a stamp. The redwoods, they are everywhere. You look straight ahead: Redwoods. You look up: Redwoods. To the left or to the right, you look down, there are trunks, and branches, and roots, and leaves, and the little bits of brush that grow inbetween. You can take a photo, but you never capture a redwood. The only time you can experience a redwood – let alone a redwood forest – is when you’re there, when the dome of your eyes sees only redwoods in branch or trunk or root or leaf.”

“Yes,” I said.

“So Iapteus – “

I touch my head, and my heart.

And we both laugh and roll our eyes at the cuteness of it all.

I do it first – the time lag as we talk means we never do anything together – but I’m getting good at knowing if a response is spontaneous, or if the fart on the other end is just parroting what they see so they can get what they want out of me.

And he knew the line, spoken by a fictitious spaceman: “Space is small. Only the planets are big.”

Fence Done. Weenie Dog for Scale

LOOK! The back fence is done. Except for the staining. And I've still got the side fence to do. And all that siding. BUT AT LEAST THE BACK FENCE IS DONE.

BONUS: I made two fake campfires out of the scraps for the Cub Scouts.

Net-Metered Whining BUT COLLECTIVELY!

TO          Idaho Public Utilities Commission
               PO Box 83720
               Boise, ID 83702

RE: Proposed Changes to Rocky Mountain Power’s Net Metering Program for its Idaho Customers

Our family has had a 4.72 kWp solar power installation at our house for just over a year. We’ve enjoyed the opportunity to produce our own power, do our part to help conserve the environment, and put our family on a long-term plan to save money.

With Rocky Mountain Power looking to change its net metering system in Idaho, we have some concerns and questions. Notably: Why is Rocky Mountain Power offering its Idaho customers a less-appealing deal than it agreed to in Utah with its customers and the Utah Division of Public Utilities? I realize this is a question best answered by Rocky Mountain Power, but as the Idaho Public Utilities Commission is in a much stronger position to bargain with Rocky Mountain Power on behalf of Idaho solar customers, I’m addressing this same question to the commission.

As I’m sure the commission knows, Rocky Mountain Power asked your Utah counterpart for a change in net metering. What was agreed to in 2017 is that existing net metering customers of Rocky Mountain Power in Utah would be guaranteed no changes to their net metering agreement with Rocky Mountain Power through 2035. The deal Rocky Mountain Power is offering its current Idaho net metering customers is far less generous, with changes being phased in ten years after the change, not the 18 years offered its Utah customers.

I don’t pretend to understand the complexities of producing and buying power and providing it for customers spread over a wide geographic area. I recognize Rocky Mountain Power needs money to maintain and upgrade its investments in power production and distribution. I also recognize one of the reasons Rocky Mountain Power is asking for changes to net metering in Idaho is meant to ensure its solar-power generating customers pay their fair share of maintaining that network. But I would also expect Rocky Mountain Power to treat its Idaho net metering customers as equitably as it treats its Utah customers.

While I appreciate Rocky Mountain Power is looking to protect all of its customers by asking for a change to net metering in Idaho in order to ensure its net metering customers are paying their fair share of system maintenance costs, Rocky Mountain Power should also recognize that we as solar customers have ongoing costs which will take longer to pay off under their proposed changes to net metering. We’ve done our part, including using the full amount of our federal tax credits for our solar installation to help pay the loan we took out to install solar power at our house. Like Rocky Mountain Power, we’re interested in being able to pay the bills. I feel the utility’s proposed changes to net metering for its Idaho customers will swing the situation too far in the utility’s favor.

Thanks for your time,

Brian Davidson

Nobody Withstands the Machine

WESTLEY [Strapped to a table]: Where am I?

THE ALBINO [In raspy voice]: The Pit of Despair. Don’t even think [he coughs, gags, clears his throat; speaks normally] Don’t even think about trying to escape. The chains are far too thick. And don’t dream of being rescued, either. The only way in is secret, and only the Prince, the County, and I know how to get in and out.

WESTLEY: Then I’m here ‘til I die?

THE ALBINO: ‘Til they kill you, yeah.

WESTLEY [Noting the Albino washing his shoulder wound]: Then why bother curing me?

THE ALBINO: The Prince and the Count always insist on everyone being healthy before they’re broken.

WESTLEY: So there’s to be torture? [The Albino nods] I can cope with torture [The Albino shakes his head vigorously] You don’t believe me?

THE ALBINO: You survived the Fire Swamp, so you must be very brave. But nobody withstands The Machine.

The Machine. Though the concept of the suction pump is centuries old, as Count Rugen says, I can feel it sucking my life away. And though that’s a bit dramatic, it is kinda how I feel editing Doleful Creatures. But I’ve got to get there. I’ll get out of the Pit of Despair, albino or no albino. I’ll find that wheelbarrow. I’ll find that holocaust cloak. And I may have to find my own Fezzik and Inigo. But find them I will.

Because the story is there. It wants to come out. It’s salvageable, though I’ve got to wash a lot of krep off it.

Finding Inigo and Fezzik will be essential. I can see the story, I can hear it struggling in the krep, but I’m having a hard time extracting it.

But I know I can do this. I’m promised in my partrirchal blessing if I put my mind to it, I can accomplish difficult things, and will see the fruits of my labor come forward. That gives me hope.