itouched

Funny thing, progress. And technology. And progress and technology mixed together.

As I believe I've mentioned here, my in-laws got us an ipod touch (I'm not sure myself where to put the capitals anymore, so I've given up). I've spent the last few hours trying to get it connected to our wifi network. Much frustration, which has not ended yet. Through finagling with the security settings on my router, I've got the itouch connected. But now I've lost connectivity on the laptop. Which is of concern, because my first foray on the Web with the itouch leaves me thinking that the itouch is good for passive activity, but for anything that requires detailed reading or text entry, frankly, I prefer the laptop. I just can't read the text on the itouch, given that the screen is so small. And text entry? Can't call up the keyboard to save my life. I know I've got some learning to do. But right now, well, we'll see.

The Simpsons - Steve Mobs

It's fun to see the skewerer get skewered.

Day After Christmas: Economic Stimulation, at 50 to 75 Percent Off

Message of the day: Christmas is over. Go back to work.

It snowed all day yesterday, while we were diving into that cornucopia. At least four to five inches, with a lot of wind that blew it into places that had forgotten they were there. So this morning, first had to shovel out the front walks and driveway so we could get the garbage out to the curb. That was important because the garbage was just overflowing, and that was with even sending a lot of the debris of the day up the chimney.

Then we went out to stimulate the economy by taking advantage of struggling retailers putting all their Christmas decorations on sale. I make it a point every year to decorate the house with lots of lights. Don't care if it's not so environmentally-friendly. We conserve a lot throughout the year, what with using electricity off-peak, burning wood rather than gas and limiting automobile travel, so I feel we're a little entitled to a little extra fun at Christmastime. So we bought lots of lights. Lots of lights, to make up for the ones I had to throw away last year and didn't replace.

We also got a new Christmas tree, on a fire sale price at Ace Hardware. Got a $280 tree, pre-lit, for for $70. Michelle could have flown home she was so happy with it. So that makes everything right with the world. We gave the Ace guy a pretty good scare though. The tree we bought was a display model that was in no way going to fit back into the box it came in. So we loaded part of the tree up in a cart, and he followed with the rest in a box. I parked the cart by a very small car next to the van so I could clear the kids out of the way, and he thought we were going to try to cram the tree into that tiny car. That gave us all a pretty good laugh.

Except that when we got home we had to clean the snow off the back porch and sidewalks so we could get the new tree out to the shed for storage. Got everything done, even two loads of firewood up to the house, except getting the tree stowed. Will do that tomorrow.

Busy now trying to get the itouch set up. You know, it was a nice gift and all from Michelle's parents, but I was just feeling good that I'd gotten Michelle an ipod, catching up with the rest of the world, now we have this new toy to jigger with. Have been connected to the Internet for the past two hours now, downloading the new software for the itouch. Giving Steve Jobs more money. You know, the genius that Apple fired and then re-hired. You'll have to see the Simpsons video. I'll try to find it on YouTube. But have been too busy trying to get the itouch connected to our wifi. Now I can have three devices connected to the Internet at the same time. Michelle will be rolling her eyes for sure.

Detritus for the Rest of Us

It's now nearly 5:30, and with the washing of our Christmas dishes from an early Christmas dinner, the holiday is officially over. The kids are upstairs surrounded by their Christmas detritus, busily building one the four or five Lego sets they received from relatives and Jolly old Saint Nick. It's snowed all day, so the roads are closed, the world is close, the skies are dark and all seems right with the world. It's quiet outside, except for the idiots up the street rushing about the pasture on their snowmobiles.

The kids let us sleep in this Christmas, but my bladder was not as charitable. It had me up at eight am -- which isn't too shabby, considering we have three young ones in the house. Of course, we haven't wound them up as much about Christmas morning as Michelle and I were wound as children, so that helps.

Michelle, to prove that she understands her husband's basic guyness, got me Apollo 13 and The Great Escape on DVD. One a modern epic, the other, an epic of epics. These will make for great watching. Who could ask for more except some macho-monkey movies to watch over the holiday?

And yes, we received monkeys, too. Sock Monkeys, made by my sister Maaike (who sells them on her blog, by the way. So click away.) One of them rode home from Oma's house on the steering wheel last night. Lexie thinks they look like bandits, with the dark coloring around their eyes.

Michelle likes her camera. At least I think she does. She hasn't thrown it out yet, so that's a good sign.

I got books. Many books. One called Nemesis, by Max Hastings, from Martin in England (thanks, Martin). Another, Die Alone, by David Howarth. A third, Nuclear Terrorism, by Gramah ALlison. All look like excellent reads.

And I'm feeling tired. So tired. Need a nap. May blog later. But right now, too busy. Sleeping.

Daddy's Duties, Christmas Eve Day

'Tis the day before Christmas. I'm home from work and, as are most Dads, engaged in fatherly duties on this most auspicious day. My day, thusfar, has included:

• Clear the back porch, deck, and sidewalk to the shed of snow.
• Shovel snow off the woodpile.
• Stock the wood barrel on the back porch.
• Cajole kids into cleaning up their toy messes and to make their beds.
• Upload a bunch of photos to Uncharted. Hey. I'm a guy. Puttering will happen.
• Wash a lot of dishes. From breakfast, two rounds of pie making, and the construction of a cornbread salad.
• Thaw a turkey. This year I eschewed the under the armpit method for a thaw in the sink.
• Bathe the youngest child.
• Briefly consider combining the last two chores, reasoning that the extra hot water will be cooled by the turkey, so there's no fears that the youngest would be burned. But then reconsider because considering how filthy the kid is, we'd have to toss the turkey out afterward.
• Shave.
• Fetch sundry items from the outdoor freezer, including whipped topping, raspberries and a turkey torpedo (unrelated to the 19-lb turkey thawing in the sink).

And it's only 2:14. Who knows what else will be required of me today?

Dignity Takes A Holiday

So the New York Post has pictures of Barack Obama shirtless on the beach.

While this is better than the New York Post having pictures of Dick Cheney shirtless on the beach (and I can make fat guy jokes, being of teh fat guy variety myself) one has to wonder, where has the dignity gone? Not that Barack Obama going shirtless is a terrible thing. He's entitled. He's on vacation. He's on the beach. The beach implies, for men at least, that shirtlessness is acceptable. But do we need pictures of the Shirtless One to ogle? Does the Obama-as-God-and-Savior camp need more evidence that their chosen one is not only the soon-to-be leader of the free world, but also close to the Greek ideal of manhood and godliness? I suppose they do.

I feel badly for the Obamas. They have no private life for the next four years.

The Post reporter quotes a Manhattan fitness expert, saying Obama must be eating right. The Post reporter quotes famously-ripped California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger backpedaling from his calling Obama a girly-man loser. And I have to wonder, with the financial crisis that California is in, with the financial crisis that the nation is in, do we need reporters bothering people with such stupid questions? What's nest: Mr. Obama, is it boxers or briefs? What's worse than the question being asked (as Berkeley Breathed said when the question was asked of Bill Clinton) is that it's likely to be answered.

Bye-bye, dignity.

The Bosom Quota Has Not Been Met

"The language of our culture no longer describes real life and, pretty soon, something's gonna blow."

--Jean Shepherd

So. Not only are so-called progressives upset with President –Elect Barack Obama’s picks for his cabinet positions, now, too, the National Organization for Women is upset that Mr. Obama didn’t regard gender as the sole reason for making his decisions.

From CNN.com:

“When you are looking at a Cabinet and you have such a small number of women in
the room when the big decisions are being made, there need to be a lot more
women's voices in this administration," said Kim Gandy, president of the
National Organization for Women.

No matter than out of 20 positions on the cabinet, five have gone to women. No matter that these numbers are comparable to the number of female cabinet members under the Bush and Clinton administrations. NOW did not get what it wanted, which was more, lots of it, right now Barack because we all voted for you dammit so now ya gotta whore for us all.

And this:

"In this case, we have seen Obama emphasize credentials," said Anne Kornblut of
The Washington Post. "I think they obviously knew they would get a lot of bang
for their buck, so to speak, in appointing Clinton, but at the end of the day,
the numbers really aren't any more impressive than any previous president."

No matter that Obama’s picks might have possibly been based on, oh, something stupid like finding the best person for the job, looking at credentials and credibility over race and gender. The Bosom Quota has not been met.

I applaud efforts to include individuals of different genders and races in government. But I deplore that such choices should be made on race or gender over ability and credibility.

CNN’s article on the matter is also deplorable.

About two-thirds of the way through the article, we get this sentence:

Some progressives, meanwhile, are also disappointed that Obama has tapped
moderates for key positions.

So I anticipate either new ire other than what I’ve written about before on this blog, or new ire over some new choices for “key positions.” Instead, the rest of the article is more liberal whining over Obama asking the Pastor Rick Warren to give a prayer at the inauguration. A prayer. At the inauguration. If this is a key position, then the Civil Service of the United States has gone on a hiring spree in the last few years. Never knew there was a position of Prayer-Offerer in Chief. A key position? Really.

Then there’s this:

People for the American Way President Kathryn Kolbert told CNN that she is
"deeply disappointed" about the choice of Warren and said the powerful platform
at the inauguration should instead have been given to someone who has
"consistent mainstream American values."

Allow me a cruel chuckle, Hiss, because whenever I hear anyone talk about “consistent mainstream American values,” I automatically know it’s code for “consistent mainstream American values with which I or my interest group happen to believe in.” Certain facets of society, mainstream or not, may not agree with Warren and his views on homosexuality (that it’s wrong), but to insist that these certain facets of society have mainstream American values is ludicrous because what is “mainstream,” what is “American” and, indeed, what are “values” changes with the blowing wind and the rushing tide. My mainstream is not your mainstream. And if you want mainstream values, you can’t go to the polls to figure them out. A sample is not going to give you the mainstream, no matter what the folks at Gallup say.

The libs, by the way, especially those of the gay/lesbian variety, look to the coming generations for hope in getting their lfiestyles into the mainstream. That may be well and true. But the norm for the upcoming generation is that they can cheat on tests and plagiarize papers but still consider themselves normal, upstanding, good people. And so it goes. I think Jean Shepherd is right. Something’s gonna blow.

Oh, the Irony . . .

Well all love it when the wisdom of the ancients trumps the foolish trappings of modern life. So when this e-mail began circulating at work earlier today, the guffaws and commentaries on the shrewd ancients were rampant:

Why Arizona does not have Daylight Saving Time:

The state of Arizona listened to the Wise Old Indian...
When told the reason for daylight saving time
the old Indian said,

"Only a white man would believe that you could cut
a foot off the top of a blanket and sew it to the
bottom of a blanket and have a longer blanket."

That old Indian must not have been a Navajo, as the Navajo nation observes Daylight Saving Time while the rest of the state of Arizona does not.

More Poetry

On the Inland Sea

Wind drops
ripples.
Not on water.
On the inland sea.
Wind whips
waves
pulsing
fanning
on the inland sea.
Whiskers waving
heads drooping
dripping green
on the inland sea.
Wind whips
the green ship
green ship plying
on the inland sea.

Poetry Time

NOTE: More stuff I found floating around in that file of really old garbage I wrote years ago. Some of it still appeals. This one, for example, though riddled with cliches, I still like.

Through the Hole

for MHF

though the hole see the sky

past the green see the flat

yellowed field smooth patch and rippled kentucky blue

browned with cold freezer burnt

watch the road white ice black

sunning cat - fence sitting fatly - peering through

peering through swatches green

not be seen, dare reveal

hiding place: juniper canopy at corner house

through the hole see the sky

hop to branch prepare to fly

stretch the wings: small brown and drab but flying still

know the air hello the breeze

wan yellow sun bare leafless trees

winter now, but soon to come the smiling spring

latch to branch whistle song

as the cat pouts below

scan the field across the street for succulents

push the branch let it go

magic arms and fanning tail

no leap of faith as sparrow glides to field below