The Anti-Social Network

Used under a Creative Commons license.

The problem with developing an anti-social media platform is, obviously, how do you get people who really catch the vision of it to sign up?

With oversharing merging with voyeurism – Chatroulette, remember that, and Color, we’re going to be hearing A LOT about that one soon enough – I’m beginning to think the only growth area in social media that remains untapped would be to go after people who are naturally anti-social.

What would an anti-social network look like, populated with hermits and recluses and such? Status updates would – from the wild hair individual who wanted to reach out while they were shunning the world – probably look like this:

Another evening at home. With the phone off the hook. The lights out. And damned if I’ll respond to the doorbell. Because it doesn’t work.

Or

Still hiding in the bathroom stall, waiting for that freak at the sink to leave. Fifty seconds and the water’s still running? How long does it take to wash a pair of hands?

Or

—U—

That’s supposed to be a tongue sticking out.

Anti-social folks, I admit since I am one, have their filters wound perhaps a bit too tight. You’d believe this of me if you met me in person, but not, however, if you know me only on Facebook, where I tend to be a bit more logorhheic. You owe us thanks, because we’re not likely to glom onto this new Color app because our filters are so tight we don’t necessarily want our raw images shared instantly with everyone else who has that particular app.

Filters are good.

Filters are our friend.

So I can’t see an anti-social network really being trafficked all that much, making such a platform doomed to failure before it even began. At least I’ve got the guts to admit it.