Well, that's a lie. They'll get curious about anything. Right here, Daisy is getting curious about the tile job I'm starting in the kitchen. Hope to have a good swath of it finished by the time this weekend is over.
I don’t know how the debate over allowing gay adults to be
leaders in the Boy Scouts of America is going to play out, nor how The Church
of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints will react if and when that decision is
made (I have some hints, but I can’t speak for the church, obviously).
I do know, after eighteen months of being a scoutmaster, there
are many more things I’m more worried about as far as my boys go and the
BSA goes than whether adult gay leaders (or squirt guns) are allowed or not.
Allow me to share a few:
Uninvolved parents. I’m going to paint with a
broad brush here, and also add that there’s some indifference that I could
erase if I were a more effective leader (see No. 2). I do know that the scouts
I see succeeding – whether it’s through advancement, deeper involvement in
scouting (through Order of the Arrow or working at scout camps or whatever –
are the scouts who have parents who are actively involved in their boys’ work
as scouts. Those boys whose parents aren’t involved may or may not advance –
because as a scout leader, I can’t do everything (again, see No. 2). Maybe parents
are indifferent because they don’t know what they can do to help (see No. 2).
Or maybe they’re rightfully wrapped up enough with jobs, extracurricular
activities and other stuff that they’re happy to hand scouting over to someone
else. I just know pound for pound, scouting is more effective if parents are
involved. I only get your boys one or two hours a week. They’re yours the rest
of the time.
Ineffective leaders. I’ve been to Wood Badge. I’m
trained up the wazoo. But I am, at the bottom of everything, a human being with
a full-time job and a part-time job and I’m trying to write a book and be a
scoutmaster. I’m swamped. I should spend more time training the boys on how to
be leaders. I should spend more time working with parents so they know what
they can do to help their own sons out. And sometimes when I’m with the boys, I’m
cranky. I can be boring. I try my best, but I’m a technical writer and
introvert working with a bunch of energetic 12- and 13-year-old boys. There
just isn’t enough time in the day. Especially when there are blog posts to be
Inattentive scouts. This past Tuesday, I had to
go round up five scouts who were hiding in the chapel because they didn’t want
to participate in the service project with the older scouts and the young
women. I had them almost out the door of the chapel when I realized I only had
four of them. So I chased them down to opening exercises (See No. 4) and then
had to prowl the dark chapel looking for the fifth. I found him hiding in the
choir seats, playing a game on his phone. He confessed right away he was hiding
and didn’t want to participate. I got kind of mad at him and he knew it (See
No. 2). And as I walked him to opening exercises, I had to chase the other four
back into the room. Scouting is supposed to be fun, I know. But sometimes these
boys need to know there’s work – and, yes, drudgery – involved. That’s life.
And when I get them in the room to work on whatever, even if it’s a game, I’ve
got ten minutes tops before their attention span is worn out completely.
Heavy LDS-ness. I confess there are times I skip
opening exercises. Two of my ten boys aren’t members of the church. Another
three aren’t active. And even when OE takes up fifteen, twenty minutes, they
all expect to be cut loose at 8 pm. Opening exercises takes valuable scout time
away from me. And there are times I wish we could skip combined activities that
are basically a Sunday meeting in a Tuesday disguise. My non-LDS scouts are
bored. My LDS scouts are bored. And, to tell the truth, I’m bored. These are well-intentioned activities and many of them are of great worth to my scouts, LDS or not. But some of them, well, they're sleepers. I have to be
very specific and tell them what’s happening each month on the day we have our
combined activity and how it fits into scouting, or at least half the scouts
don’t show up. Every month.
Distractions. One boy comes to scouts every
Tuesday starving, and rightly so. Mom and Dad both work, and it’s often not
until late that they’ve got dinner ready. I feel his pain – I head to scouts
straight from the bus. We both spend the entire time thinking about how hungry
we are. Then there are the cell phones and tablets. I have taken them away more
than I can remember – but they always come back out as soon as the next meeting
starts. I have a wife who can pay better attention to things if she’s got her
hands occupied; she remembers more from Sacrament meeting than I do, and I’m
paying attention while she’s playing mah-jong. I’ve got two scouts like that.
They can tell me exactly what we’re talking about, even with a game going in
front of their faces. The other boys can’t. So I either let everyone have a
device out and fight for their collective attention, or everyone puts their
devices away and I fight for their collective attention.
Sports. I love that my boys are involved in
baseball, basketball, track, and wrestling. It’s good for them. They learn
teamwork, dedication, and how to remain physically strong. But I have scouts
who miss outings because of sports. They miss Tuesday nights because of sports.
And I struggle to keep them caught up (see nos. 1 and 2).
Self-righteous helpers. There are many of you
who have read this list and are ready with smug replies as to why I should let
the patrol method, Wood Badge training, or any other scouting-oriented buzz
concepts help me fix these problems. There are also many of you out there ready
to say that if my scouts are more interested in their devices or sports than
they are in scouting, then I must be an ineffective leader. You’re partially
right (see No. 2). But mostly, I want to tell y’all to stuff it. I’m doing my
level best and have the support of our bishopric and many of the parents whose
boys are in my care. And since I’m LDS, I already have a pre-recorded sense of
guilt playing 24/7 about my many failings and inadequacies. I don’t need any more from you. What I need from you are an
occasional shoulder to cry on and an empathetic ear. I am working on the patrol
method and on applying my Wood Badge training – don’t assume I’m not. If you
are, that’s your self-righteousness talking, not your willingness to understand
and to help.
Poor communication. This runs the gamut from the
council to myself (see No. 2). We’ve had two camporees so far this year. Those
who organize them work hard to produce a wonderful program for the boys – that also
results in partial merit badges that I now have to squeeze into our schedule to5
finish because the camporee organizers never tell us what’s going to be
accomplished at the camporee so we can complete requirements beforehand, or organize
camporees in a way that partially completes a merit badge when the badge could
be completed entirely with a little more organization. (Speaking of which, I
need to pause this entry to complete a merit badge card for one of our scouts;
see No. 2.) On to me: I need to communicate more effectively with parents, so
they know what they can to do help. To do that, I do a lot of handouts (they
mostly go home with the scouts, which is only partially effective, see No. 5).
I also do a blog. Which some of the parents read. And some do not. There’s
something about leading a horse to water here, but I can’t quite put my finger
on it. (Same goes for me. I could call the camporee organizers to find out what
we can do before we go to the camporee to finish the merit badges, but I don’t
(see nos. 2 and 8).)
I’m not going to go on, but I could probably come up with
another two to round out a Top Ten. Even if the BSA were to decide to allow
adult gay leaders, and even if the LDS Church, my chartering organization,
agreed to the change, there are simply too many other things for me to worry
about than whether my next assistant scoutmaster – or my successor – is gay or not.
WARNING. The rest of this blog post focuses on my personal
thoughts on what BSA National President Robert Gates said concerning adult gay
leadership at the national meeting today. Read at your own peril.
Robert Gates, president of the Boy Scouts of America, is
rocking toe Boy Scout world today.
Or is he?
CNN reports he’s calling for an end to the BSA’s ban on gay
adult leaders, following on the heels of its 2013 decision to allow gay scouts
to participate in Scouting.
He stops short of that, in reality. What he is in fact
saying is that the BSA should change its policy to allow individual chartering
organizations the right to set the criteria for adult leadership, thus letting
the chartering organization – not the national organization – set the standard.
[D]ozens of states – from New York to Utah – are passing
laws that protect employment rights on the basis of sexual orientation. Thus,
between internal challenges and potential legal conflicts, the BSA finds itself
in an unsustainable position.
We can move at some future date – but sooner rather than
later – to seize control of our own future, set our own course and change our
policy in order to allow charter partners – unit sponsoring organizations – to
determine the standards for their scout leaders. Such an approach would allow
all churches, which sponsor some 70 percent of our scout unites, to establish
leadership standards consistent with their faith.
Our oath calls upon us to do our duty to God and our
country. The country is changing and we are increasingly at odds with the legal
landscape at both the state and federal levels. And, as a movement, we find
ourselves with a policy more than a few of our church sponsors reject – thus
placing Scouting between a boy and his church.
For me, I support a policy that accepts and respects our
different perspectives and beliefs, allows religious organizations – based on
First Amendment protection of religious freedom – to establish their own
standards for adult leaders, and preserves the Boy Scouts of America now and
forever. I truly fear that any other alternative will be the end of us as a
I agree wholeheartedly with what Gates says -- the BSA should let individual chartering organizations decide the issue.
Could the LDS church – of which I’m a member – appoint a gay
Here’s the word from “Handbook 2: Administering the Church”.
So I’m not accused of taking anything out of context, here is the full section
on “Homosexual Behavior and Same-Gender Attraction” (highlights mine). Liberals will be offended by the first part. Conservatives by the latter part. So retain an open mind and read the whole thing.
Homosexual behavior violates the commandments of God, is
contrary to the purposes of human sexuality, and deprives people of the
blessings that can be found in family life and in the saving ordinances of the
gospel. Those who persist in such behavior or who influence others to do so are
subject to Church discipline. Homosexual behavior can be forgiven through
If members engage in homosexual behavior, Church leaders
should help them have a clear understanding of faith in Jesus Christ, the
process of repentance, and the purpose of life on earth.
While opposing homosexual behavior, the Church reaches out
with understanding and respect to individuals who are attracted to those of the
If members feel
same-gender attraction but do not engage in any homosexual behavior, leaders should
support and encourage them in their resolve to live the law of chastity and to
control unrighteous thoughts. These members may receive Church callings. If
they are worthy and qualified in every other way, they may also hold temple
recommends and receive temple ordinances.
And to those who argue such an appointment would lead to a
violation of the Scout Oath, I’ve got to tell you something: I’m in violation
of the Scout Oath myself. I’m a fatty, see. I’m about eighty pounds overweight.
I am not keeping myself physically strong. Yet I’ve been a scoutmaster for
almost two years now, and everyone involved in my charter organization seems to
think I’m doing a good job. If the BSA were to instigate a policy requiring a
sensible body mass index reading, I’d be out on my fat rear end.
Now on to those who would argue the LDS Church would leave
scouting if such a policy were put in place. Well, I suppose anything could
happen. But it ain’t gonna. If the church allows chaste, gay members to serve
in the church and hold temple recommends, the only thing stopping the church
from allowing chaste, homosexual scout leaders is BSA policy, not church
policy. What Gates is proposing if you read his speech closely aligns pretty
well, in my opinion, with the LDS Church’s current stance.
Again, this is my
interpretation of the church handbook and policy. I am not a prophet nor do I
claim to have received any revelation on the subject (see No. 2 above). Others
are welcome to form different interpretations. If you can come up with a
different interpretation that is consistent with the policy quoted from the
handbook, I’d love to hear it.
I’ve previously written about Paul Fussell’s “The Great War
and Modern Memory,” and have to conclude that while Fussell has introduced me
to other writers I should probably read, I’m probably not going to read this
He makes a good argument. Over and over and over again. And
over again. I’m pretty sure he could have argued that writers’ experience in
World War I and their familiarity with common motifs and metaphors in English
literature were going to influence each other and probably mean some of the
motifs and metaphors would be used in an ironic fashion in a lot fewer pages
than he uses in this book. And that’s okay. He’s an academic, and it’s his job
to go on and on and on and on and on about what he believes in. I’m a blogger;
I get that.
Boys in the Boat, The; by Daniel James Brown, 416 pages.
Presidential Transcripts, The; edited by Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein. 693 pages.
Servant Leadership, by Robert Greenleaf. 363 pages.
Spirit of Ricks, The; by David L. Crowder. 455 pages.
Read in 2014
Adventures of Captain Bonneville, U. S. A., in the Rocky Mountains and the Far West, The; by Washington Irving. 364 pages.
And Another Thing, by Eoin Colfer. 273 pages.
Behind the Scenes of the Nixon Interviews, by David Frost. 346 pages.
Case of the Nervous Newsboy, The; by E.W. Hildick. 106 pages.
Class: A Guide through the American Status System, by Paul Fussell. 202 pages.
Code Talker: The First and Only Memoir by One of the Original Navajo Code Talkers of WWII, by Chester Nez with Judith Avila. 310 pages.
Complete Cul de Sac Volume One, The; by Richard Thompson. 314 pages.
Complete Cul de Sac Volume Two, The; by Richard Thompson. 314 pages.
Doleful Creatures, by Brian Davidson (beta read) 251 pages.
Feardom, by Connor Boyack. 160 pages.
Great War and Modern Memory, The; by Paul Fussell. 363 pages.
Journey to the East, The; by Hermann Hesse. 118 pages.
Long Haul, The; by Jeff Kinney. 217 pages.
My Man Jeeves, by P.G. Wodehouse. 128 pages.
Right Ho, Jeeves, by P.G. Wodehouse. 186 pages.
See Here, Private Hargrove, by Marion Hargrove. 217 pages.
Starbird, by Robert Schultz (beta read). 580 pages.
Ze page total: 4,459 pages.
The Best Part
Right Ho, Jeeves, by P.G. Wodehouse
“So you think I’m going to strew prizes at this bally Dotheboys Hall of yours?” [asks Bertie Wooster of his Aunt Agatha after she’s asked him to present prizes at the school where she serves on the board of governors]
“And make a speech?”
I laughed derisively.
“For goodness’ sake, don’t start gargling now. This is serious.”
“I was laughing.”
“Oh, were you? Well, I’m glad to see you taking it in this merry spirit.”
“Derisively,” I explained. “I won’t do it. That’s final. I simply will not do it.”