An Analysis of Analogues

There's a lot of, uh, chatter out there about whether analog or digital musical recording is superior.

Check that.

There's a lot of chatter out there about whether analogue or digital musical recording is superior.

There is a difference. Certainly between digital and analog. And most certainly between analogue and analog.

Part of the trouble here lies in synonyms. According to the American Heritage Dictionary, analogue is a noun meaning "something having analogy to something else" Pretty straightforward. It comes from the same word from which we get the word analogy. Here comes the trouble: It's acceptable to spell this word as analog as well.

Now, analog, spelled this way, also means "of or pertaining to a mechanism that represents data by measurement of a continuous physical variable, as voltage or pressure." This word, used this way, is an adjective. In this sense, however, it makes no sense to use the "analogue" spelling, the noun. So DON'T DO IT.

Inconceivable!

First, this:

Which leads, of course, to this (which spawned the following):

I used to work at Toys R’ Us back during my high school years, and I had a boss who absolutely hated my guts. He legitimately treated me badly to try to get me to quit, and the strategy had worked on two other people.

Note the use – misuse, rather – of legitimately. The word Opie’s scratching around for here is probably literally, though, as the commenters point out, it could also be deliberately, at least in the first case, but not in the second.

What’s going on here is someone’s trying to use a two-dollar word on a seventy-five-cent vocabulary. If you want to use a word, make sure it’s the right word before you use it, else you’ll end up looking foolish. Not getting-involved-in-a-land-war-in-Asia foolish, but foolish nonetheless.

Just as egregious, however, is this. At least Opie No. 1 had the smarts to use a real word, albeit incorrectly. Opie No. 2 here just makes one up.

In this case, we’re likely dealing with someone who uses the commonly-accepted abbreviation for legitimate: legit. While it’s an acceptable word, it’s hardly on that can be made into an adverb without making you look silly. Legit is slang, and has its origin among snobs who wanted a word to mark the difference between television dramatics and those put on a stage. Stage dramatics were more legit, they said, because that's the kind of bohemian thinking that goes on among those on stages, I suppose.

What's worse about the first example is that it takes the winds right out of Opie No. 1's story. If he were legitimately berated, then why in the world is he complaining about it? As for Opie No. 2, well, her mistake just makes her sound a wee bit illiterate.

It’s true that we drive the language, rather than letting it drive us. But as we drive the language, we ought to be careful to avoid wrecking it.

Phonics Gone Mad

People, people, people.

I know I'm guilty of the occasional typo. The occasional transposition. The occasional flub from a fat-fingered typist. But at least I look words up if I'm not sure how to spell them.

Unlike this guy, who went totally commando on "hilarious," which, even for middle schoolers, isn't a difficult word to spell.

If you're to weak-stomached to click the link, I'll reproduce the spelling here. And I promise it's ugly:

hulariouse

Gouge out your eyes if you want. Or ponder, for a moment, this guy:

trying to spell. Just remember, them Hogwallops'r kin!

So unless you're this person and are looking to turn your Star Trek TNG persona into a pseudo-adjective, get a dictionary.

Speaking of personas, with this post I introduce the Phonics Nazi, the more evil twin brother of the Grammar Nazi. Get used to hearing from both of them.