Grammar Nazi: Nuqjatlh?

I’m concerned we’re devolving into Klingon.

Now, I’m sure there are experts in the Klingon language out there who will bristle at the thought of anything “devolving” into Klingon. Let me reassure you by saying this: Hab SoSlI' Quch! (And if you think you can’t find common Klingon phrases on the Internet, well, you are as they say in the vernacular, nuqDaq 'oH puchpa''e'.)

So Klingon is a fine language. But to see English spelling taking on Klingon attributes when no such attribute is meant, well, it’s maddening.

Saw this today in a posting at thatsmyboss.com:

In fact, he was one of the nicest individuals at the facility and it took me a’back.

Really? Where did that apostrophe come from, pray tell?

And (a segue) from the same poster:

I dealt with the job until I was accepted for a research based position, but my boss behaved in a fairly unorthodoxed manner on my last day.

Unorthodoxed? Really? I agree wholeheartedly with the maxim that if you’re gonna use a woid, use a big ‘un, but you ought to know how to use the big ‘un you’re using.

Then there’s more Klingon from a different poster:

There were stories that the regional salesman would spend time in his personal bathroom with his laptop but that may just be here-say.

Again, using a fun word is perfectly acceptable. Just make sure you’re spelling it correctly, not just how you think it ought to be spelled. And while some correct spellings may call for punctuation, be sure to double-check before you fling punctuation marks into your words indiscriminately.