More Fossilized Fud Music

First, Blondie. A No. 9 hit in the United States in 1981 with "The Tide is High." And I think after watching this video, I'm proud to say that I was not part of the MTV generation. Of course, I was only 9 at the time this song was popular, meaning my connection to it was just that same old AM clock radio in the kitchen, the radio that played this song a lot while we were eating breakfast and waiting for the bus.

Not that videos make a lot of sense these days, but what the heck was she trying to say in this video?

1. Get the ugliest troupe of guys in New York City together for a video.
2. Sing to Darth Vader, who inexplicably looks like he has an enormous coin slot in his head.
3. Sing while wiping up water on the floor.
4. Sing while tramping down the street.
5. Suddenly switch over to 1970s rocketry.
6. Then back to some city where naked men are carried through walls made of cardboard boxes.

I can take some comfort in knowing that, as I watch this video, Blondie is as bad at dancing as I am.

Here's the original. It's even worse than Blondie's version. My wife made me shut it off.

Then there's a group called the Atomic Kittens that covered this song. They're worse than The Paragons. Their version of the song is bleh, and they look like Bratz dolls. Hillary Duff also recorded it. I'm not even going to bother looking.

Back to Blondie. She looks SO BORED in this video. I can't figure it out. Maybe it's that 80s disinterested cynicism showing through. Or the unfamiliarity with singing in a music video, which is obviously dubbed. It kinda looks like something Playtone would put together.